The holidays are a time of both joy and stress, especially when you run a business. Instead of enjoying our families, we business owners, managers and supervisors feel guilty for not being more productive. And on the flip side, if we do keep working, we feel guilty for not spending more time with family.

Here are some tips I’ve collected to make the holidays less stressful but still feel like we’re accomplishing our business goals.

Pace yourself. The last thing you want is to disappoint, so make sure you end up with work and social activities that are manageable and that you can deliver on. This includes taking into account that other people might be on their holiday vacation, as well as remembering you also need your own sleep, exercise, and relaxation. You might feel like the Energizer Bunny now but it’s easy to wear yourself out. Remember to take care of yourself. No one wants to be sick over the holidays.

Schedule well ahead of time. Don’t wait until the last minute to ask for time off. Talk with your family and coworkers to find out how much time you and they would like to take off. And make sure to let everyone know when you will be gone. Keep in mind that not everyone celebrates the same way you do so don’t assume you’ll be able to make those last-minute plans to socialize with relatives or visit customer accounts.

Keep gift giving small. If you decide to give coworkers gifts, keep them small and low-cost. Or do something for the entire department, floor or building, like bringing something to share with the whole team.

Keep your exercise routine. Shorter days take their toll on everyone’s energy, and that’s before you throw in bad weather, increased traffic and a sense of needing to get everything done before time off. One way to get energized at the office is by getting exercise. Skip the elevator and use the stairs, park in the last row in the parking lot, or go for a walk outside each day at lunch.

The holidays are a fun and joyous time. Stay calm and focus on what needs to be done at the office when you’re there so that you can relax when you leave. Rather than feeling like you got off track because you were enjoying the good cheer of the season, continue the momentum you have going.  The key is remembering the holidays are a chance to just enjoy being with friends and family, including your work family! Just sayin’. 

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – Nov/Dec 2019

The fall is an opportunity to not only set new goals for the months to come but to remember those resolutions you made at the start of the year. Revisiting the hectic spring and summer months will reaffirm those goals and help you build momentum for the New Year. Don’t let this year’s goals carry over into next year.

Here are some ideas for taking stock of the past months and adjusting or resetting your goals for the future:

Review. Looking at where you’ve been tells you where you want to go. Think back on the year so far and the goals you set back in January. What were your big victories? What slowed you down? What would you have done differently if you had to do it over again? Taking the time to review these simple questions can make a huge difference in setting the tone for the rest of your year. 

Plan. There are probably items on your list you still want to make happen, right? Put them on the top of your To-Do list. This is helpful particularly if you know you have some big things coming up next year. Stop making excuses and accomplish those 2019 goals!

Start Small. A fresh start resets old ways of thinking and behaving, giving you an opportunity to change. Setting goals that are too far-flung can overwhelm you, which ultimately leads to disappointment. So instead of planning the entire year like you would in January, think about some short-term goals.

Find What Motivates You.  Are you a people person but stuck in a job that requires lots of alone time? Maybe that’s why your work goals seem so daunting. Figuring out what drives you means knowing what really matters to you. Remember to set goals that allow you to use this internal motivation. You’ll be amazed at how much you can get done.

Uncover Your Strengths. These are your talents, skills, and abilities—the things that people praise and seek your guidance for. Knowing what you’re best at allows you to take advantage of opportunities; most of the time these strengths and skills are the things we love to do or what we’re naturally good at. If your goals aren’t aligned with your strengths and skills, think about slowly shifting them towards what you really thrive at. This will make them much easier to achieve them.

Define Your Beliefs. Your strengths address “what?” Your values and principles answer “how?” These underlying beliefs steer everything you do and help define who you are or want to be. If you don’t value money, then reaching a sales goal probably won’t be easy. But if helping people is an underlying belief, then a goal of having 100% customer satisfaction could really get you moving.

The fall is a great time for reflection. Try turning over a new leaf and use these ideas to help you get a firm grasp on those last few goals of yours. Getting things in order for the rest of the year will help you feel less overwhelmed when the craziness of the holidays hit. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – Sept/Oct 2019

There are certain words, phrases, and tones that you use every day to create a better relationship with your customers. Because words have incredible power, they can either make someone’s day or destroy it. Words can get you a five-star review or turn even the most loyal customer against you. Here are a few lessons that I’ve learned over the years to help you use your words effectively.

Find out. Talk about what your customer’s needs are and what they want. Ask if they understand or have questions instead of over- or underexplaining. It’s easy to accidentally belittle someone when you’re trying to close a sale or resolve an issue. Remember that you can’t force a customer to make a decision. They need to feel comfortable and ready.

Think before you speak. Albert Mehrabian, a professor of psychology, came up with the rule determining that successful communication is made up of three parts: the words you use, your tone of voice, and your body language. Don’t believe me? Try this exercise. If someone asks you how you’re doing, tell them, “I’m doing really well. How about you?” What’s the response? Now try, this: “I guess I’m all right.” Quite a different reaction, right?

Watch your tone. Tone is everything, especially on the phone. Tone of voice, inflection, volume, and pace of your speech are much more important when you’re speaking to someone over the phone because they can’t see you. Customers will make judgments about your attitude, willingness to help, and even your personality based on the way you speak to them.

There is no “try.” Avoid telling customers that you will “try” to do something for them. To quote Yoda, “Do or do not. There is no try.” Use phrases like “Let me speak with my supervisor to see what we can do,” instead of “I’ll try.” Saying that you will do something helps clients feel secure. They’ll trust that you’re working hard for them instead of merely going through the motions.

Attitude is key. One of the first things I learned in business is to have an attitude of gratitude, and it’s one of the first things I teach both my employees and franchisees. Expressing thanks regularly and doing it well is one of the most profitable business strategies you can share.

Go old school. In a world of emails and texts, a handwritten thank you note goes a long way. Whether it’s a note for a coworker, employee, or a customer, it’s a sure way to stand apart from the crowd.

End on a high note. When you say “thank you” to your customers, they tell their friends and family about the exceptional service and products you deliver. Word of mouth recommendations lead to new customers, too, which is what everyone wants.

Remember that your words have more power than you think. Your customers want to know that you’re on their side and doing your best to help them. So watch what you say and how you say it—no one likes talking to a machine! Just sayin’. 

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – July/August 2019

With all the talk about downsizing, decluttering, and Marie Kondo-ing lately, it’s easy to imagine you can wave a magic wand and leave all of your worries behind. You’d spend your time on what really mattered to you, right?

Years ago, after a good dose of soul searching, I gave up a lucrative but highly stressful executive position. I wanted a simpler life. Here’s what I discovered along the way.

You are an asset. Think about that. If you work for someone else, you’re an asset to that company. You’re important to the community you live in, your neighbors, and to those you interact with you on a daily basis. Plus, your value grows, not diminishes.

Count your blessings. Having an attitude of gratitude changes negative thinking into a positive frame of mind. Research shows that practicing gratitude may be the best pathway to happiness, health, long life, and prosperity.

Reward yourself. Take a break, especially when things don’t go the way you’d like, and reward yourself when you succeed. Celebrate little things like checking off items on your to-do list with a special cup of tea or square of chocolate.

Nourish your body. Healthy eating means making choices you can live with and enjoy for the rest of your life. It doesn’t mean dieting, which is a short-term plan. The way we eat over the long term affects our entire well-being, helps us feel our best and gives us energy. Proper nutrition can help you handle stress better, too.

Exercise your mind. I remember that my dad read everything he could get his hands on and as a result he knew a little bit about everything. So cut down on television and social media, carry a book (Kindle counts) with you, or listen to an audio book or podcast during your commute.

Be open. Be open to learning something new. Diversify your thinking and the people and ideas around you. Change with the times. Your brain withers if it isn’t challenged everyday. 

Find a sounding board. Call your go-to person, someone who listens without judgement, advises when asked, and tells us we’re being silly, unreasonable, or just plain crazy. Having a person like this gives us a safe place to explore ideas and get encouragement when we need it. They hold us accountable to our goals, too.

Pare back. If money is a stressor, you have two choices:

Make more or spend less. Determine what’s “right” when it comes to how you earn, invest, and spend your income.

Make a sanctuary. Wherever it is, make this place special by decorating it in a way you love. Use color, texture, and music to create this sanctuary. Even a small, sunny nook for reading or listening to music can destress, relax, and recharge you.

There’s no special formula for a simpler life. Instead, I’m convinced that no matter how deep in debt or how rich, how unhappy or content at home or at work, you can make your life better. Sometimes all it takes is a bit of fine tuning, investing some time and energy into figuring out what you really want out of life. Sometimes it takes major change. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – May/June 2019

The key to keeping your life simple and healthy is creating consistent routines. I first wrote that back in 2011 and I still believe and practice it today. To quote F. Matthias Alexander, “People do not decide their futures. They decide their habits and their habits decide their futures.” And a routine is, after all, a habit.

I’ve come up with several routines over the years that have helped keep my body healthy and my mind focused, and here they are.

Schedule the Important Things. During the weekday you can develop good habits by working out or taking your favorite yoga class on scheduled days. Schedule appointments only on certain days, and make sure that Mondays and Fridays are left with no appointments so that you can gather your thoughts and catch up. This helps you deal with the unexpected while ensuring that the important things always get done.

Toss, File, Act. Try to spend 5 to 10 minutes each day keeping your work space well organized. Organization is a breeze when you go through the mail and toss, file, or act on it on a daily basis. Throw away things you don’t need and reorganize your desk before you quit working. Write out a to-do list at the end of the day and leave it for yourself the next morning. Do the same at home, too. Soon this will become a habit and a way of life.

Go-to Place. At home, find an area for things that you need on a daily basis: keys, purse, backpacks, or letters to be mailed. Also, keep a petty cash jar handy for all household members to use for parking, lunches, or a tip for the delivery person.

Don’t Forget Weekends. For us, we like to eat out on Friday nights. Saturday is our shopping day for food, clothes, or any other errands that need to be done. On Sundays, we like to stay at home and cook for the week. This routine is a way to unplug and relax from the hectic week, something we look forward to. Having this day to regroup also helps us to prepare for the week ahead. 

Get Some Sleep. We all need between 7 and 9 hours of good, quality sleep per night to function at our best. So commit to getting into bed and turning the light out an hour earlier than usual. Or take a nap in the afternoon on the weekends. 

Walk the Dog. You and your best friend will benefit from a routine walk or hike. That’s why my time to walk my dog Jake is on the weekends, without fail. As soon as I put my baseball cap on and pull down his leash, he’s ready to go. Even he’s on a routine! This clears my mind and helps both of us to stay active and moving.

Attitude of Gratitude. Buy yourself a journal and spend a few minutes a day counting your blessings. Gratitude gives you a positive frame of mind. Research shows that routinely practicing gratitude may be the best pathway to happiness, health, long life, and prosperity.

Replace Habits. Make an effort to identify bad habits. Focus on creating new, positive ones to replace the bad. For example, I love to watch TV, especially the Food Network. But instead of focusing on the negative aspects of reducing my TV time, I developed a routine of sitting quietly, reading with soft music playing in the background. This breaks up the not-so-good habit with a better one and keeps me balanced.

You’ve heard it all before; repetition strengthens and confirms. Knowing you can fall back on built-in routines will get you through the day and further develop healthy habits. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – March/April 2019

It’s finally time to usher in the new year! Now that the winter holidays are over, I’m looking forward to having the time to reevaluate myself, my home, my work, and my relationships, and make changes where needed.

How are you planning to make the most of 2019? What will it take to make sure you fulfill your new year resolutions? Think about it! Here are a few tips that will help give you a fresh outlook for the coming year.

Forget About It. Your setbacks and failures do not define your success in the coming year. How you respond to them does. Don’t beat yourself up if you mess up. Don’t let your mishaps and setbacks affect you more than they should. Reflect on the lessons they hold, make adjustments accordingly, and get back in the saddle.

Learn to Let Go. When you give too much credence to other people’s opinions, you end up trying to please everyone with every decision you make. That’s a recipe for discontent. Stop doing it. Learn to let their expectations run off like water off a duck’s back.

Change Your Perspective. Whenever I get stuck in a rut, I change something. I take a different route to work. Or I tweak my hair or nail color. Or I try a new recipe for dinner. Or I reorganize my closet and wear clothes I rarely reach for. I already have exactly what I need, I just need to look at things differently.

Commit to be Fit. And not just physically. Join a class at your fitness club, an exercise group, or a sports team. Not only will you get in shape and lose a little weight, you develop both mental and physical strength. A healthy mind and active body work in unison to make you a happier, healthier person.

Get Out.  Studies show that being outside for even half an hour a day has amazing health benefits—both mentally and physical! Here in New Mexico, we’re lucky to be able to enjoy the outdoors year-round, so I do my best to make the most of it by taking walks and eating outside. 

Help. Volunteer to help others—people, animals, the planet, whatever! Whether you choose to spend time helping out at your local library, walking dogs at the shelter, or building a house for someone in need, there are always nonprofit organizations that want and could really use your help. If your time is in short supply, why not just clean out your clutter? Donate your old furniture, clothing, or other household items you no longer need rather than leaving them in basements and attics to collect dust.

Look Forward. Research tells us that having something to look forward to—a vacation, a sporting event or concert—is as rewarding to us as the actual event. I print out road trip directions, marking places to stop along the way. I get excited about lunch dates with friends and mark them in BIG BLOCK letters on the calendar. But my favorite is to get away for a night or two with my spouse at a great hotel, and have a romantic dinner and a wonderful massage. While we don’t go far or spend much, I come back feeling like I’ve been a world away.

The near year is an opportunity to start fresh, so make the most of it. It’s the perfect time to reevaluate and make improvements. Just sayin’. 

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – January/February 2019

Many of us start the holiday season with high expectations. But all too often, our dreams of a picture-perfect holiday leave us frazzled and stressed. As we race to find the perfect gifts, make the perfect meals, and open our perfect homes to our perfect family, in-laws, and friends, the holiday season floods with everything but joy.

I don’t know about you, but in my life, nothing is perfect! Someone’s gift is not quite the right size, color, or flavor. The potatoes get burnt, the roast is dry, and the house is a constant mess. But this year can be different! Here are some easy ways to turn this holiday season into one to remember.

Movie Night. Everyone has a favorite holiday movie. Why not invite a few of your friends or gather up the family and arrange a holiday movie night? Then you just need to sit back and enjoy It’s A Wonderful Life, Love Actually, or The Holiday. Or, for those more action-packed movie fans, Home Alone.

Start a Tradition. Another way to make this your best holiday ever is to start a tradition. You could invite your family or friends over for a fall football game (either watch or play), purchase an ornament, host a cookie or recipe exchange, or visit somewhere new. Here in New Mexico, we have tamale-making parties and luminaria tours. Make your holiday tradition something that’s meaningful for everyone.

Be Realistic. The holidays don’t have to be exactly the same as last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Be open to creating new ones. For example, if your older children can’t come “home,” find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails, or videos. Or think about taking turns hosting the holidays.

Shop Online. You can find pretty much everything online these days. With meal and grocery delivery services and other online stores, you can even have your Christmas tree shipped right to your door. You can even spring for gift wrapping. 

Find Time for Yourself. Make sure to carve some time for yourself, your partner, or friends. Maybe it’s getting away for a couple of days to your favorite spa and resort, or an afternoon by the fire with good book. Do something that makes you happy so you don’t feel like all your energy went into planning and worrying about everyone else’s happiness.

Move. Unless you can get your 10,000 steps in at the mall, keeping your exercise routine is key to destressing the holidays. Exercise releases endorphins (the feel-good hormones) and helps work off the added calories of holiday treats. Ask a visiting family member to join you, hitch up the dog, and go. Or head to yoga with a buddy and tone up those muscles. Your body will thank you.

Learn to Say No. Saying yes when you should say no can leave you feeling resentful and overwhelmed. Sometimes you just need an evening at home instead of another social event, dinner or party. Friends and colleagues will understand if you can’t participate in every project or activity.

When the roast is burnt and the potatoes dry, open another bottle of wine and laugh! Laughter is what the holidays are ultimately about. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – November/December 2018

Many of us think of our lives, both personal and work-related, as traveling in a constant cycle. We have busy periods and times of rest. In our business, we hire and train new employees, introduce new products, then settle into a period of “steady as she goes.” Then we start again by focusing in a new area. We plan and hold meetings, evaluate, and start planning again.

Our personal lives can be the same way. As much as we love the times full of friends and family, we appreciate the slower periods, too. They allow us to regroup, relax, and refresh.

Because every battery―work or personal―needs recharging. Here are some of the tips and techniques I’ve learned over the years to keep all the balls juggling without burning the candle at both ends. 

Identify what’s most important to you. In times of intense work or personal activity, keep your focus on what you value most. What 4 or 5 things do you most want to accomplish in your day, week, or month? Identifying these core priorities will help you focus on what’s most important as you move forward. 

Learn to say no. Quit doing things out of guilt or a false sense of obligation. This will make more room in your life for the activities that are meaningful to you.

Organize your time. Keeping a schedule will keep you organized, which will in turn make you less frantic. Trust me. Schedule a set time for work, chores/errands, and leisure.

Stress relievers. No matter how busy you get, always make sure to set aside time to do something you love! You can’t be expected to accomplish all of your goals if you aren’t making time to destress. Go to a yoga class, walk your dog on Sunday morning, or find a cozy corner and curl up with a good book. Give yourself time to catch your breath.

Toss/File/Act. Organization in the office and at home is a breeze if you toss, file, or act on those papers, emails, and other distractions immediately. Use this strategy to tackle the paper piles or unread emails. Once you get the stacks of paper under control, make sure to keep them under control!

The Social Network. Online social networks are one of the greatest inventions ever. It’s tempting in periods of stress and in down times to hang out there, but they can suck your life away. I have made a rule to check Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn once in the morning while I’m drinking my coffee. Checking it throughout the day can be a real time siphon. It’s also tempting to check in when there isn’t something immediate drawing your attention. Don’t give in. Notice how much you get accomplished when you give yourself clear boundaries.

Give yourself a break. Some days we just don’t have the energy to accomplish everything on our list, or even anything on the list. Don’t be afraid to put your work aside and enjoy some time relaxing with friends and family or taking time to be by yourself.

Laugh. When all else fails, laugh. Look on the bright side and have a sense of humor. Everyone feels sad, angry, or frustrated at some time. Laughing can help ease difficult situations and give new clarity.

In the struggle to meet the demands of an increasingly complex world, we all need to develop strategies for maintaining balance in our lives. Recognizing the constant ebb and flow of work and personal life is part of that strategy. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – September/October 2018

Whether you have 5 employees or 5,000, ineffective communication generally leads to increased staff turnover, decreased morale, misunderstandings, hard feelings, and a perceived lack of importance. No business can survive these problems for long.

Your ability to communicate effectively can make the difference between success and simply “getting by,” but this doesn’t happen by accident. It requires time, study, and coordinated effort. Here are a few “be’s” of communication that I’ve learned over the years to get you thinking about how to improve yours.

Be Personal. Far too many of us use our business emails or texts as a substitute for personal interaction.. Make sure to set aside time to meet your coworkers and employees live and in person. People relate to one another better when they can read each other’s body language and hear tonal inflections. If personal contact is not possible, the next best way to connect is by talking on the phone or Skype.

Be Positive. A positive, upbeat attitude lets people know that you care. People like to communicate with other friendly and approachable people. The words “please,” “thank you,” and “you’re welcome” show that you appreciate a person’s effort. Consistently emphasize the good and reward achievements.

Be Available. People need to know that you’re not sitting on a throne guarded by dragons. Be approachable as an individual. If your time is not to be interrupted, put a sign on the door stating when you’ll be available. Your employees should feel like they work with you, not for you.

Be Consistent. Consistency builds trust. You can’t be nice one day and bite someone’s head off the next. You will be feared instead of admired, and no one will tell you anything. 

Be Sure. When you give instructions or discuss a business situation, don’t assume that everyone understands you. Ask whether you’ve been clear or if further information or explanation is necessary. Remember: no one can read minds! Ask, “Did I explain this clearly enough?” 

Be Clear About Expectations. Clearly share your expectations with your employees. This ensures that there will be clarity on the work to be done. They will comprehend what you expect without misunderstandings. 

Be All Ears. Perhaps the most difficult communication technique of all is effective listening. Don’t interrupt. Pause and make sure that the other person has stopped talking before you start talking. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listening to others shows you respect them. Make your conversation like a game of tennis and keep the ball going back and forth. If you both serve at the same time, the game will not go well. 

Be Curious. If you hear something that confuses you, ask. Maybe you missed a detail or maybe you remembered something others forgot. Chances are if you’re confused, then others are, too.

I promise that if you try these tips, your communication will improve. Just sayin’. 

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – July/August 2018

As I get older, I find that I’m becoming wiser. That may sound like a cliché, but even clichés are based in truth. Wisdom does come with age―mostly from making mistakes and learning from the consequences.

Anyone who has been in business for any amount of time has made mistakes. The most important thing to remember is that each mistake is a chance to learn, and to grow personally and professionally. Here are some things I’ve learned over the years.

Identify what’s most important to you. What do you value most? What 4 or 5 things do you most want to do or experience in life? When you identify these core priorities, you can evaluate your work and personal life against them. Really want to take that month-long safari vacation in Africa? Make it happen by saving money and vacation time. On the other hand, if building a business empire is a core priority, dedicate the time to make that happen.

Speak and act honestly. Are you able to stand behind what you do and say? If not, reexamine your words and learn to articulate your thoughts in an open and honest way. This helps eliminate misunderstandings down the road and maintains your personal integrity. Integrity is a big factor in business success, too.

Learn from your mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, so don’t beat yourself up if you make one yourself. As long as they’re looked at as learning experiences, they can be a good thing. Just make an honest effort not to repeat them.

Take care of it Right Now! This applies to both your business and personal life. Clean as you go. Sort through the mail before you put it down; junk mail in the recycling, bills in another bin or basket. Deal with personal mail the same way. Don’t pile everything up into an overwhelming mess (I see you, clean but unfolded laundry…). Don’t walk past it and wonder how your office, business, or home got to be so messy.

Give it 24 hours. Give yourself 24 hours to digest an upside-down situation, conversation, or an important decision. By giving yourself some time and not acting immediately, you’ll avoid any drama that may follow later. This also works if someone has offended or angered you. By waiting a day or two to confront them, you can approach the situation with a level-head.

Laugh out loud. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Humor is a positive coping mechanism that not only improves your mood but builds self-esteem. Learn to laugh at yourself, and others will see you as someone who doesn’t fly off the handle in times of stress.

Take care of your body. If your body is healthy and in good repair, you’re better able to handle any stress in your life. However, an unhealthy body can cause great amounts of additional stress. Eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly, drink plenty of water, and get enough sleep.

Get rid of unnecessary things. This applies not only to belongings, but services, subscriptions, and people that bring negativity and stress to you. Surround yourself with people and things that you really love. Ask, “Do I really need this?” If you hesitate, you don’t.

Give yourself a break and learn from your past. Reflect on the people, things, and ideas that have shaped you. Take the negative and positive lessons and apply them going forward. Be happy you’ve gotten to this point―you’ve grown. Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – May/June issue 2018